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Girl Meets Flaws/Transcript

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The following is the transcript for Girl Meets Flaws:

Interior. John Quincy Adams middle school history class.
Cory: Graduation and awards night is coming up. I am very proud of this class. Several of you will be recognized for your achievements throughout the year.
Maya: (Stands up) Awards are a scam! A girl like me never had a chance, Matthews. Never had a chance. (Stares at Riley)
Riley: All right, I'll do it, but it's ridiculous. (Stands up) It's a scam, Matthews! She never had a chance!
Cory: Maya will be receiving the Griff Hawkins Totally Cool Award.
Maya:

(Sits down) (Class claps for her)

Riley:

Maya, you just found out you won the Totally Cool Award, yet you just sit there? Oh, you're being cool. Why won't you rub off on me?

Cory:

(Walks toward Lucas) And our two finalists for the Scholar Athlete Award are... Lucas Friar... (Class claps) and Billy Ross (Class claps)

Billy: I hope you're ready for some competition, dude.
Lucas: Oh, well, you know how I hate competition. 
Billy and Lucas: ( Laughs both lean in closer, Back up, Laughs, Lean in, Back up, laugh)
Maya: Hey, Golden Boys, you wanna hop down from your cloud of awesomeness? You're making us normals feel bad.
Billy: Yeah. Right after our handshake of awesomeness. (Billy and Lucas stand up and do their handshake)
Maya: Every day.
Riley: Girls should have their own handshake of awesomeness.
Maya: What would it be? 
Maya and Riley: (Both flip hair) Stop it.
Cory: Farkle, you are being awarded the Joseph T.R. Epstein Confidence Award.

Congratulations. Farkle?

Recording of Farkle's voice: Farkle can't come to his desk right now. If you have a question for Farkle, say, "One;" a comment, say, "Two;" billing questions, "Three."
Cory: One. Where are you?
Recording of Farkle's voice:  You have selected "Three."
Cory: No, I said, "One."
Recording of Farkle's voice. Sorry, we are experiencing unusually high call volume. Your call will be answered in approximately...
Man's voice: 35...
Recording of Farkle: Minutes. (Guitar plays)
Cory: Representative! What is this? Farkle's never missed a class in his life.
Riley: (Bells rings, everyone stands up and exits except Maya and Riley) (Walks up to Cory) 
Cory: Yes? 
Riley: Everybody's getting an award but me. What good is having you as my teacher if the fix ain't in?!
Cory: I'm sorry, Riley.
Maya: Riley, you don't need a trophy to make you feel good about yourself.
Riley: Yes, I do. Sometimes I feel kind of invisible.
Farkle's voice: Sometimes you want to be invisible, Riley, believe me.
Title sequence. John Quincy Adams middle school Janitors room. Farkle and Harley are talking.
Harley: My congratulations on your confidence award. Will you be leaving the luxury of my custodial suite now? 
Farkle: You think I'm hiding out, don't you? Well, Farkle doesn't hide out from anyone... except my aunt Barbara. She's a lip-kisser.
Harley: You're avoiding someone, Farkle. What happened?
Farkle: I don't really think it's something you can relate to, Janitor Harley.
Harley: Oh, right, because I would never understand how cruel kids could be to each other, right?
Farkle: You were like me as a kid?
Harley: I just know what you might be dealing with is all. I'm not proud of how I know... (Sighs) but I know.
The hallways of John Quincy Adams middle school. Lucas, Maya, and Riley are looking for Farkle.
Lucas: I looked in the library. He's not there.
Billy: (Enters) Hey, guys, I checked the ball field. No Farkle.
Maya: You looked on the baseball field for Farkle? (Laughs) Billy, are you even trying? 
Billy: Not really. (Exits)
Harley: (Opens door and walks out with Farkle) Troubled lad, I now release you to the hands of your caring friends, 'cause they... have time for this. (Goes back in and closes the door behind him)
Lucas: You wanna tell us what's going on here, buddy?
Farkle: Are you my buddy?
Lucas: What?
Maya: Spill it, Farkle.
Farkle: Somebody made fun of my turtlenecks.
Riley: Your turtlenecks?
Farkle: Yeah, somebody said they make me weird.
Maya: You are weird.
Riley: She doesn't mean that.
Maya: Sure, I do. He knows he is. He embraces it. But you already know that, Farkle. That's what makes you unique.
Farkle: What good is being unique if somebody knows you're really not?
Interior. Matthews' appartment. Topanga and Cory are sitting on the couch.
Topanga: Look at everything we've accomplished in our lives: A beautiful daughter...
Cory: I did that.
Topanga:  ...who's spending the night at Maya's...
Cory: A wonderful son who's hanging with his grandparents.
Topanga: I just love the kids so much, I don't even know what to do.
Cory: Me too.
Topanga and Cory: Yay! We're alone! 
Cory: (Kisses Topanga on the cheek)
Topanga:  Mmm! Oh good. I still like it.
Ava: (Enters) Guess who it is! (sings) It's Ava Morgenstern! Yay!
Cory: How is this happening? How?!
Topanga: Uh, Ava, Auggie isn't here right now.
Ava: My mother said you'd be happy to watch me while she tells my daddy what he is doing wrong.
Topanga: How long does that take?
Ava: It's supposed to stop? 
Topanga: (Whispers to Cory) We have to do this, don't we?
Cory: (Chuckles) We're stuck!
Ava: And tonight you can't pick me up and say, "Whee!" and put me outside. And I say, "But...!" and then you slam the door in my face... even though I love that! 
Topanga: But I want to.
Ava: Maybe later. But right now, make room for... (sings again) Ava Morgenstern!

Interior. John Quincy Adams middle school history class.

Cory: Ghandi. What'd he do?
Maya: Freed Ireland.
Cory: Try again.
Maya: Freed Ireland.
Cory: Freed India.
Maya: Before or after he freed Ireland?
Cory: Jackie Robinson. What'd he do?
Billy: First guy to play in the major leagues after Gandhi freed 'em.
Cory: I-- I quit.
Farkle's voice: But you can't quit, sir!
Cory: And you need to be in my class, Farkle. How long are you gonna be out sick?
Farkle's voice: Don't know. (Coughs) Pretty bad cold, sir.
Cory: Okay. Feel better. (Points to a picture) What about her?
Riley: That's Malala. The Taliban doesn't think that women should be educated. She stood up to them and became the first teenager ever to be nominated for a Nobel Peace prize.
Cory: Sometimes the world presents you with opportunities to show who you really are. Will you have the courage to stand up to someone who tries to take your spirit away?
Riley: May I be excused?
Cory: For what?
Riley: The world has presented me with an opportunity.

Interior. Janitor's room. Riley enters and sees Farkle with Harley.

Riley: (sighs) Farkle. Nobody in this school loves to learn more than you. Get back into the classroom where you belong. Nobody gets to crush your spirit.
Farkle: My spirit's fine. I just don't want to be me anymore.
Riley: Why? Because somebody said something about what you wear? Stupid reason. Stupid shirt. (tugs at Farkle's shirt) Stupid, stupid, stupid shirt. It isn't you.
Farkle: You can have these, Janitor Harley. (picks up his turtlenecks) I'm done with turtlenecks.
Harley: Aw, jeez. Thanks, kid. (looks at Farkle's turtlenecks) They won't fit me. Oh, it's a good thing-- they're horrible.
Riley: (grabs Farkle by his shirt) Farkle, this isn't you. This isn't the Farkle I know. And I want to know why and I want to know now.
Farkle: He said I was the biggest nothing in this school.
Riley: What?
Farkle: He said I had no right to walk around acting all confident and pretending like people liked me. He said I had no right to have friends like you, because I was the biggest nothing in this school.
Riley: (hugs Farkle) Farkle, it's not okay that somebody called you that.
Harley: Kids can be very cruel. I know this from personal experience.
Riley: You were picked on as a kid?
Harley: No, I was the other one, the picker-on-er. I'm so ashamed. Just-- just look away. (Lucas and Maya enter)
Riley: Somebody told Farkle that he doesn't deserve us as friends.
Maya: Who?
Farkle: It's not important.
Maya: It's the most important thing in the world. I'll find him myself and I'd hate to be him when I do. (about to leave the room before Lucas lifts her) Am I there yet?
Lucas: Farkle, don't let what anybody says get to you. That's what gives them power.
Farkle: Why are you my friend?
Lucas: What is it with that?
Riley: (sighs) Farkle... would you just come back to class?
Harley: Pippi Longstockings is right. I, janitor Harley Keiner, was in my youth a school meanie. And someone you all know and love was often the target of my shenanigans. But his will was so strong, it changed the nature of our relationship forever. In fact, he even got me this job, and now I hold him in the highest esteem. (Cory enters) Hey, Johnny Baboon!
Riley, Maya and Lucas: Johnny Baboon?
Cory: You promised me!
Harley: Oops.
Cory: Farkle, you're here. Are you okay?
Farkle: I'm fine, sir.
Cory: Good. Then I'll see you in my class Tomorrow morning.
Farkle: Yes sir. (he and the other kids exit)
Harley: Hey, baboon. You're a pretty scary dude.
Cory: I learned from the best.
Harley: Yeah, I was the best. (has arm around Cory) Now give me your lunch money.
Cory: I'm a teacher. I don't have any.
Interior. Matthews' appartment. Riley, Maya and Lucas are sitting on the bay window.
Riley: This is a very special place to us, Lucas.
Maya: This is where Riley and I figure out our most important stuff.
Lucas: Do you ever talk about me here?
Riley: (Gasps) What do I do now? I don't know what to do.
Maya: Start over and move on.
Riley: (Chuckles) This is a very special place to us, Lucas.
Lucas: Do you ever talk about me here?
Riley: (to Maya) You gave me bad advice!
Lucas: Well, I appreciate you having me here. Whatever Farkle's dealing with, he shouldn't have to go through it alone.
Maya: I want my Farkle back. We're not as good without him. (to Lucas) If you tell him I said that, I will jack you up, son.
Cory: (opens door) Ah, the brain trust. You guys have one day to figure this out and fix Farkle or else you come to an adult. You understand me?
Lucas: Yes, sir.
Riley: Yes, Dad.
Maya: Yes, Mr. Matthews.
Cory: (closes door)
Maya: If we could just find out who this guy was, then I'd know (to Lucas) you'd take care of him.
Lucas: What? Beat him up? Maya, all those people on the blackboard never became like the people who were attacking them by resorting to their methods. It's just not the first response of an intelligent person.
Cory: (opens door and says to Lucas) Get out! (Lucas escapes out the window but Cory manages to get his shoe) That-- that felt really good.

Interior. John Quincy Adams middle school gym class.

Maya: Where's Farkle?
Lucas: I thought he said he wasn't going to miss any more classes.
Maya: Then why haven't we seen him?
Billy: (Enters) Oh. Hey, man. Baseball after school?
Lucas: Oh, I don't think I'm gonna make it. My buddy's still being hassled and I wanna be there for him.
Billy: Your buddy? You mean Farkle?
Lucas: Yeah, nobody's seen him.
Billy: You're better off.
Lucas: Excuse me?
Billy: (scoffs) Come on, Lucas. I don't really see Farkle as your buddy.
Lucas: Why not?
Billy: You don't think he's different than us?
Lucas: What do you mean? Smarter? Yeah, he's the smartest kid in school, but he doesn't make a big deal about it. (Billy sighs) I mean, he does wanna take over the world and everything, but frankly, I'd like to see what he does with it.
Billy: Lucas, Farkle is a nothing.
Lucas: (grabs Billy and pushes him to the wall) You're the one who did this to Farkle? Why would you do that to a guy like him?
Billy: I don't know. 'Cause he's a guy like him. You wanna let me go now?
Lucas: You're the nothing, Billy!
Maya: Lucas, don't.
Lucas: I thought this was what you wanted, Maya.
Billy: What? She wanted you to pop me, Mr. Perfect? Well, I don't think that's what he's gonna do.
Lucas: Yeah. (chuckles) No, that's what I'm gonna do.
Maya: No! (jumps on Lucas' back) That's what he wants. He wants you to be like him.
Lucas: (groans)
Billy: You see, Lucas is like me. We live in a cloud of awesomeness, remember? Handshake? (does the handshake solo)
Lucas: I don't like you like this. This isn't the Billy I know. And I wanna know why and I wanna know now. (to Maya) And would you get off my back?
Billy: Come on, man, the Billy you know is your teammate, and that comes way before whatever these guys are to you.
Riley: "These guys?"
Maya: Boy, are you wrong.
Lucas: These guys are my friends... all the time, not just on the field.
Billy: How are you even friends with that little guy?
Lucas: Because I can depend on him, because he's the most loyal person I've ever met, because he's my best friend.
Farkle: You really mean that? (Riley, Maya, Lucas and Billy look up to find Farkle hanging on a rope) You're my best friend, too!
Lucas: Farkle, how'd you get up there? I thought you couldn't climb the ropes.
Farkle: I can't! But in desperate situations, apparently I can fly!
Riley and Maya: (gather enough mats for Farkle to fall down on)
Lucas: (to Billy) You really don't want to be friends with a goofball like that?
Billy: Not really, no.
Lucas: Let me ask you something. What's wrong with you?
Billy: There's nothing wrong with me.
Lucas: I've never actually seen you hang out with anybody that isn't on the team.
Billy: Dude, whatever. I don't need this.
Lucas: You don't? Too bad. Because friends like Farkle don't just fall out of thin air.
Farkle: (screams and falls down)
Billy: You can have him. You'll figure out sooner or later that they're not us.
Lucas: Who's "us?"
Billy: (starts leaving the gym and runs into Harley)
Harley: Nice. That's exactly the way I used to think. Now here I am... with a mop.
Billy: (sighs)
Maya: Okay, we're done. It's all over. Nothing more to do except carry on with our simple, middle-school lives. Except... (points to Riley)
Riley: What are we gonna do about Billy?
Maya: Riley, you can't fix everything. Okay, go ahead.
Farkle: (sighs) I almost died.
Lucas: I know, buddy.

Interior. The Matthews' apartment. Cory, Riley and Maya are seated at the kitchen table while Topanga is making breakfast.

Riley: I don't even think Billy thinks he did anything wrong.
Maya: Yeah. Where's that come from?
Cory: Girls, at this age, you're just finding out who you are. I mean, people don't usually walk around wearing signs that tell you.
Ava: (enters wearing a T-shirt that reads "Spoiled Rotten") Here I am!
Cory: Oh, what do I know?
Ava: Where's my brekkie?
Topanga: Oh joy.
Ava: And none of that toaster pastry. Everyone knows that's a shortcut, Topanga.
Maya: (says to Topanga while holding a toaster pastry) Why don't you love us?
Topanga and Ava: (steps close to each other)
Riley: Uh-oh.
Topanga: (picks up Ava and kisses her)
Ava: What was that for?
Topanga: Never change, Ava.
Ava: You know, if you ever wanted to kiss me again, I wouldn't stop you.
Topanga: You be exactly who you are, Ava. You wear it proudly.
Riley: Was that for my benefit, Mom?
Topanga: How ya doin'?
Maya: Riley, you can't fix everything. (Riley looks at Maya) Okay, go ahead.
Interior. John Quincy Adams middle school. History class. All the students - except Billy - are shown with their personal flaws written on their foreheads.
Cory: What's going on?
Darby: Riley made us write on our heads! (fittingly the flaw written on her forehead is "tattletale")
Cory: Riley?
Riley: (points to the flaw on her forehead) Insecure. It's always mattered more to me what my friends think about me than what I think.
Cory: Maya?
Maya: (points to the flaw on her forehead which reads "broken") When I own it, it doesn't make me feel so bad.
Cory: Good. So, before someone can use our own flaws against us, maybe it would help us to admit we all have 'em. (Billy gets up from his seat and starts to leave) You going somewhere, Mr. Ross? Trying to be invisible?
Farkle: Believe me, it doesn't help. (lifts hair to reveal the flaw on his forehead which reads "nothing")
Cory: You know, Billy, you seem to be the only one here not wearing a flaw. Do you not have any?
Billy: Well, none I know of.
Maya: What made you treat Farkle the way you did?
Riley: Yeah. We never thought of you this way, Billy.
Lucas: I always thought of you as the good guy.
Billy: Look, I like people who are... like me. Is that a flaw? Because I don't think so.
Class: Yes.
Billy: (to Farkle) You don't think I know I'll never be a genius freak like you? I shouldn't make fun of that?
Class: No.
Billy: (scoffs) Stop making me feel bad. I already feel bad enough you got such great friends. And that makes me feel... I don't know. Is there a word for that?
Riley: You're jealous. But you're Billy Ross.
Billy: (scoffs) Yeah. I'm Billy Ross. Jealous of you? Of him? Because this little guy doesn't need to hit a baseball to... have friends? Does that sound like jealousy to you? (looks at Riley's marker) Let me see that. (takes marker from Riley and hands it to Farkle who writes the word "Jealous" on Billy's forehead)
Riley: Welcome to the team.
Billy: Thanks. Glad to be here.
Cory: We're all human beings. We're all on the same team. And if we sense our own flaws because we see them in others... It's true friends who help us wipe them away. (hands wipes to Riley and she and Maya wipe each other's flaws)
Billy: (offers to wipe Farkle's forehead) I'm sorry, Farkle. Any friend of Lucas should be a friend of mine. (wipes the flaw on Farkle's forehead)
Farkle: Thanks. Want me to get rid of yours?
Billy: No, I just got mine. I think I'd better try to understand it a little bit more.
Farkle: Can we do the handshake?
Billy: (Scoffs) Dude. You think you're ready for the handshake?
Farkle: I'm so ready for the handshake.
Billy and Farkle: (perform their handshake of awesomeness).
Billy: Well, I don't understand anything.
Lucas: Mr. Matthews?
Cory: Mr. Perfect. (referring to the flaw on Lucas' forehead)
Lucas: Will my friend be all right?
Harley: (enters the classroom with Farkle's turtlenecks) I believe these belong to you.
Farkle: Thanks, Janitor Harley.
Harley: (clicks tongue to Farkle and then places his hands on Cory's shoulders) This is Mr. Matthews.
Cory: Yeah. People change.
Interior. John Quincy Adams middle school auditorium. Awards are being handed out.
Cory: Well, we've given out our award for confidence... (audience claps as Farkle displays his trophy) cool...
Maya: (audience claps) 'Sup?
Cory: ...And we've acknowledged our scholar athlete. (audience claps)
Lucas: (sole winner of award, says to Billy) Jealous?
Billy: Yeah... but I'm working on it.
Maya: You okay, Riles? I know getting an award was a big deal for you.
Riley: I'm okay. Really.
Cory: And now for our final award of the evening. The John Quincy Adams Spirit Award goes to the student with the courage to stand up for what they believe in and changes for the better. Now the award is voted on by the student body, so we have no idea in advance who will win. (opens envelope) Huh. (points to forehead) Proud. (reveals envelope) Riley Matthews. (audience claps)
Riley: Maya, how do I act cool about this?
Maya: You? Just be who you are.
Riley: (stands up) Yay!

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