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The following is the transcript for Girl Meets Jexica:

Interior. Abigail Adams High School. The hallway.
Maya: I'm just gonna put down whatever-- (Riley shuts her laptop on her fingers) Ow!
Riley: No, our profile on the Abigail Adams High School social network is who we are in high school and it'll follow us into college and into our careers and into my marriage and into your five.
Maya: Is one Lucas?
Riley: No, sorry. But you were married to Farkle for six weeks. (Grabs Maya's hand) May he rest in peace.
Maya: I'll tell you right now the boy died happy.
Riley: (Lets go of her hand) Hmm. Shall we begin?
Maya: Name. Maya Penelope Hart.
Riley: Really?
Maya: I've decided to embrace it.
Riley: (Typing) "Riley Matthews. Interests."
Maya: Why'd you stop?
Riley: I can't think of my interests.
Maya: You can think of your interests. You're just worried that your interests aren't interesting and your profile will bore the whole school.
Riley: Why are you only smart when it's at me?
Maya: Just skip it and go to the ones you know. Like favorite movie.
Riley: No.
Maya: Why?
Riley: Maya, what if people here don't share my passion for farm animals who save the day?
Maya: Why do you care what other people think?
Riley: That's all I do.
Maya: Riley, just write something you like and stop being so dramatic.
Riley: Okay, I am the least dramatic person who has ever roamed the face of the Earth. What did you put for your favorite movie?
Maya: Don't Look Behind You.
Riley: Did I see that with you?
Maya: No.
Riley: Why not?
Maya: Look behind you.
Riley: (Screams)
Maya: That's why.
Riley: Well, I'm sure nobody else knows what to write down, either.
Interior. Farkle, Lucas and Zay are sitting on a high school bench.
Lucas: Oh, Butch Cassidy.
Farkle: Empire Strikes Back.
Zay: The Notebook. (Lucas and Farkle stare at him) Love never dies, man.
Farkle: All right, favorite song?
Lucas: "Desperado".
Zay: Anything by Céline Dion. (Lucas and Farkle look at each other, and then stare at him again)
Farkle: The sound of my computer turning on. (Imitates computer chime) This is so easy.
Interior. Riley and Maya in the hallway.
Maya: Why is this so hard for you?
Riley: When one makes a decision, one must consider the consequences of one's choice.
Maya: Real talk.
Riley: What if nobody likes me?
Maya: You're just freaking out because your name's on it. Let's pretend that you had an alter ego you pretended to be when you are all alone that nobody knows about and put her name on it.
Riley: Yes. Let's pretend that. Ha ha.
Maya: What's her name?
Riley: Jexica.
Maya: Jexica?
Riley: Like Jessica but "x-ier".
Maya: Nobody's gonna find that adorable.
Riley: Jexica was the coolest thing she ever was. She had blue hair and she protected me.
Maya: What happened to her?
Riley: You showed up.
Riley and Maya: (In unison) Aww!
Maya: So, make a profile as Jexica. Write down all the answers as yourself, but if nobody likes her, you're fine because nobody knows it's you.
Riley: Okay. Ha, this already feels easier.
Maya: Pretending to be somebody else usually is.
Riley: (Maya starts drawing Jexica) Jexica likes all of the things that I like except she wears a green army jacket, has feathers in her blue hair and she carries a sword.
Maya: Classic Jexica. (Shows Riley a drawing of Jexica)
Riley: Hey, that's her. You think anybody will like her?
Maya: I know I do.
Title sequence. Then: Interior. Abigail Adams High School.
Riley and Maya: (Find each other and give each other a hug, then stop)
Riley: I hate not having the exact same schedule as you.
Maya: I know. I turned to talk to you in class to tell you about this little dry patch and realized I was talking to Yogi.
Yogi: (Finds Maya) Hey, you try that eucalyptus, girl?
Maya: Thanks, Yogs.
Yogi: (Walks away)
Riley: (Starts laughing)
Maya: Why are you laughing? Is one of my five husbands Yogi?
Riley: (Nods her head)
Maya: How is that possible?
Riley: We only know five guys.
Maya: You check your phone recently?
Riley: (Checks her phone) Ooh! Jexica has 20 likes.
Maya: Refresh.
Riley: (Refreshes) Jexica has 200 likes.
Maya: Refresh.
Riley: (Refreshes again) What's going on?
Maya: Jexica's super popular.
Riley: People really love her.
Maya: Look at the comments. (They both look at the comments)
Amy: (About Jexica) Jexica says everything I'm thinking.
Interior. Mr. Matthews' History Classroom.
Clarissa: Jexica makes me less afraid to be me.
Interior. Yogi is standing near the lockers.
Yogi: I went to summer camp with her.
Interior. Back in Mr. Matthews' History Classroom.
Jo: Jexica's my best friend. She's always been my best friend. She has.
Interior. Back to Riley and Maya at the high school lobby.
Maya: Now Jexica was a success. So, delete Jexica and put up your real profile and let everybody like you before it's too late.
Lucas: (To both her and Riley) Hey, guys, how do you feel about making some new friends outside our group?
Maya: Of course. Why?
Lucas: Uh, there's this girl-
Riley: What?
Lucas: (To both her and Maya) named Jexica.
Riley: What?
Maya: Delete her.
Riley: Too late.
Lucas: (To Farkle, Riley and Maya) I don't know. I just feel like I really get Jexica.
Farkle: (To Riley, Maya and Lucas) Yeah, she's a mystery woman. A mystery makes a woman very intriguing.
Zay: (Standing near the lockers) I went to summer camp with her. (Lucas pulls him from the lockers)
Lucas: (To four of them) It looks as though we all like her.
Riley: Better than Maya?
Maya: Hey!
Riley: I'm sorry. (To Lucas) Better than Maya?
Interior. The Matthews' Apartment. The kitchen.
Auggie: I'm rich! I'm rich! I tell ya!
Cory: More info please.
Auggie: No.
Cory: No?
Auggie: If you don't just take my word for it, then I'm only gonna share my $30 million U.S. with mommy.
Topanga: (To Cory) Ooh!
Cory: (To Auggie) All right, read it.
Auggie: (Reading) "I am Prince Baji from Nairobi."
Topanga: Oh.
Cory: (To Auggie) Scam.
Auggie: No scam. It says right here. "This is no scam."
Cory: Auggie.
Auggie: You taught me to read. Why would you teach me to read if I wasn't supposed to believe what I'm reading?
Cory: (To Topanga) He's got us, Topanga.
Auggie: (To both Cory and Topanga) And if it was a scam, why would they start by saying "hello, it's me, your friend from Nairobi?"
Topanga: Do you have a friend from Nairobi?
Auggie: Well, we're in the early stages of our relationship, and he wants to give me money so I'd say we're besties.
Topanga: Honey, they don't even have a real identity. They're just trying to gain your trust.
Auggie: I do trust Prince Baji. He does have a real identity. He sent me his picture. (Shows her the picture on his iPad)
Topanga: That's Morgan Freeman.
Cory: It's always Morgan Freeman.
Auggie: (Showing Cory the same picture) How can you not trust that face?
Cory: (To Topanga) Topanga.
Topanga: No.
Cory: (Takes Auggie's iPad from him) Look at this picture and tell me this isn't the real Prince Baji. I don't want him to lose his boyish innocence.
Topanga: The world is the world, Cory.
Cory: I want to protect him for as long as we can, okay?
Topanga: He has to learn what's out there sometime.
Auggie: What's out there?
Topanga: (To Cory) Okay, I'll tell you what. Why don't we say what we really think on the count of three?
Cory and Topanga: (In unison) One, two, three!
Cory: I think he's gonna be King Baji one day and I think we should get in now.
Topanga: [Laughing] Wow. What are you writing?
Cory: Happy anniversary, Topanga. Because that is the 100th time that you have one, two, three, tricked me.
Topanga: I do it that often?
Cory: You've been doing it since the '90's.
Flashback of Cory and Topanga in the '90's begins.
Topanga: All right, on the count of three.
Cory and Topanga: (In unison) One, two, three!
Cory: Angela's still in love with Shawn. I hate that.
Flashback ends.
Topanga: It's not my fault you fall for it all the time. And I can't believe you keep a list of it.
Cory: You can't imagine the lists I have put on you. Do you have any on me?
Topanga: Oh, do I have any lists on you? Let me think about it. No.
Cory: Why not?
Topanga: Because I'm a healthy person.
Cory: Well, I hate that, too. (Stands up and rushes out of the kitchen)
Auggie: He okay?
Topanga: Oh, he's fine, honey.
Auggie: I believe you. I believe everything.
Interior. Abigail Adams High School. Mr. Matthews' History Classroom. Cory teaches a lesson on social network.
Cory: I hear the freshmen just joined the social network.
Riley: Not me.
Cory: (To his class) I hear someone has already caused quite the stir.
Riley: Not me.
Cory: (To his class) So, who is ready to learn something today?
Maya: Not me.
Cory: (To his class) A social network is something that has its roots firmly planted in our history. Cave paintings, stone tablets, scrolls and papyrus leaves, they all help decode what went on in a society. Now, what are historians in the future gonna use to help determine who we were?
Farkle: The Internet and my frozen brain. (Five of the students stare at him)
Lucas: (To Cory) If they look at the Internet, they're gonna think we're pretty ridiculous.
Cory: You think? Why is that?
Zay: Because the Internet makes us look like a society of people that only care about dancing cats.
Farkle: But we're more than that.
Cory: We are but no one knows that if the dancing cat videos have a billion views and the discovery of a new planet only gets 27,000 likes.
Farkle: All me.
Lucas: (To Cory) What's the difference? Dancing cats and a new planet are just gonna be replaced by something new tomorrow.
Cory: Exactly right, Mr. Friar. (To his class) So, what does that say about us?
Maya: Oh, oh! I know. (To Farkle) It's not that we're a society of dancing cats. It's that we're a society of- (to Cory) Yes, Matthews?
Cory: It says that we're society that lets things rise and fall that have no real value because the Internet makes them so readily available to us so they get a lot of clicks and likes and comments, and then they fade out of our mind when the next thing comes along.
Zay: Well, what's wrong with a little distraction?
Cory: Nothing, if that's all that is? (To the class) How many people here have seen the dancing cats video? (His class raise their hands) What about the sneezing panda?
Maya: 'Cause it goes, "achoo!" and the other one goes, "ah"!
Cory: (To his class) It seems to me this isn't a distraction at all. It's a lifestyle.
Lucas: Yeah, but we use the Internet to study as well, Mr. Matthews.
Cory: And that's great. (To his class) Okay, so who here knows the capital of Minnesota? What about penguins? Are they in North Pole? Polar Bears at the South or is it the other way around?
Maya: We only have so much room in our brains.
Cory: Really? (To his class) Who has seen the "Charlie bit my finger"-
Class: "Charlie bit my finder." "He bit my finger." (Maya says) Charlie. (Laughing) Oh, Charlie.
Cory: Okay, I guarantee you guys that what historians will say about us is that we're a society that spent a lot of time with a click or a like or a comment. And it's especially easy if nobody knows who you are, because a lot of people spend their time posting under anonymous names. Is that a good thing or bad thing?
Riley: Good.
Cory: Good. Why good?
Riley: Just good. (She nods her head)
Cory: Just why?
Riley: Because maybe life is easier that way.
Cory: Maybe. (To his class) Or maybe hiding behind a fake screenname gives people the courage to go negative. Or someone who's too scared to express themselves an undeserved moment of attention. (The chime begins)
The man's voice: Attention, Abigal Adams High. Will Jexica please report to the school office? Jexica. We just really want to meet you.
Interior. The Matthews' Apartment. Riley's Bedroom.
Maya: I'm alone in the bay window. I've been forsaken, abandoned and a third word for alone.
Riley: I'm almost done with liking the likes that people liked of me.
Maya: You mean Jexica.
Riley: I am Jexica. I have achieved stunning and unheard of popularity. I have everything I want.
Maya: It's only because nobody knows it's you.
Riley: And that would bother some people, but not me. Because I'm too busy answering everybody's private requests for advice. Here's a new message. Oh.
Maya: What?
Riley: Nothing.
Maya: Read that one right now.
Riley: Or what? (Maya leaps from the right side of a window seat to Riley's mattress and screams at the same time)
Maya: (Reading) "Hi, Jexica, my name is Lucas Friar." Wait. Why would Lucas write to Jexica?
Riley: (Grabs her laptop and starts reading) "I have to choose between two girls. And I thought that I liked them both, but what I really love is that you want to ride unicorns while eating cotton candy and collecting falling stars. I think you would fit in with our group of friends, but please don't tell them I invited you."
Maya: (Getting off Riley's bed) He knows.
Riley: No, he doesn't know, Maya. I wish everybody knew because then I'd be the most popular girl in school, which I'm not because nobody knows. Isn't that just the way?
Maya: He knows it's you.
Riley: He doesn't know, but if he knew, it would fix all of our problems.
Maya: How?
Riley: Because if Lucas likes Jexica, then he doesn't have to choose between you and me, and we don't get hurt and he can have Jexica, and we don't get hurt.
Maya: What'd I do? I land on your head? Is that what I did? I land on your head?
Riley: (Stands on her bed, falls on her butt, raises her arms outward, and then relaxes them) I know what I must do.
Maya: That's nice. I'll wait right here. (About Riley as she's marching to her closet) Oh, look, she's marching. (Nods and looks at her nails)
Riley: (Comes out of her closet disguised as Jexica) It's me, Maya.
Maya: I know who it is, nimrod. Why does everything always have to get out of hand?
Riley: You ain't seen nothin' yet. Here's my plan.

"A" I go to school like this.

"B" I claim my new popularity.

"C" I solve our whole love triangle when Lucas falls for Jexica.

Maya: Not a thing.
Riley: "D" something goes horribly wrong.

"E" I learn my lesson.(Drawing her fake sword and exiting through the window) Lets go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go!

Maya: (To herself) What can I say? This sounds right. (Rushes out through the window)
Interior. The kitchen in The Matthews' Apartment.
Cory: Breakfast is served.
Auggie: (Comes to the kitchen with Topanga) You cooked for us?
Cory: Why, yes, August, I did. (Referring to Topanga) And not because Mommy one, two, three, tricked me, but I did it out of the generosity in my own heart, just like Prince Baji does.
Topanga: (Cory walks to one of the chairs and sits at the table) Oh, hey, I just thought of something. Would it be okay with you if we didn't raise our son to be an Internet sucker?
Cory: Why, yes, it would be as long as it would be okay with you that we did.
Topanga: (Shakes her head) Why?
Cory: Because sometimes it's okay to believe in the world. Prove me wrong, I dare ya. Prove me wrong. (The three of them hear a chime from an iPad)
Topanga: (To Auggie) What?
Auggie: It's from Ava. She's in London. She's lost her wallet. She needs to send me her all the money I have. (Stands up) Okay, you guys don't want me to trust strangers, but you've always taught me to help my friends. And Ava's my friend and I'm gonna help her no matter what. (Leaves the kitchen)
Topanga: (To Cory) Prove me wrong, I dare ya. Prove me wrong!
Cory: (Gets his pen and paper ready)
Topanga: What?
Cory: That is the 100th anniversary of "Prove Me Wrong, I Dare Ya. Prove Me Wrong."
Topanga: It's also the 100th anniversary of "Why Did I Marry You?"
Cory: Ooh, congratulations. (They both nod)
Topanga: (Turns her head some and shakes it)
Interior. Abigail Adams High School. The hallway.
Riley: (Rushes upstairs with Maya, while still being disguised as Jexica, and says to everyone in high school) Attention. Attention, everyone in the school. I have an announcement to make. I am Jexica. (To Maya) That oughta do it.
Maya: You would think but no.
Riley: Why not, pray tell?
Maya: What we've done is skipped right to "D."
Riley: (Counting her fingers) A, B, C D! This is the letter where everything goes horribly wrong
Maya: That's the one.
A girl: I am Jexica!
Another girl: I am Jexica!
Yogi: I am Jexica!
Maya: Yogi?
Yogi: Jexica!
All: I am Jexica!
Riley: What do we do now?
Maya: Too early to tell.
Maya: We'll be right back after this with our lesson!
Maya: And now its one day later. What could have possibly changed?
Clarissa: I know I said I liked her yesterday but that was yesterday. Come on!
Amy: Yeah, it's possible that I said I was Jexica to show I could be a unique individual just like her.
Jo: I don't wanna be mean, but I'm gonna. I think the blue hair and the sword may be trying too hard. I've tried to tell her but you know Jexica! She is still my best friend and everything. She is!
Yogi: Hey guys, have you seen the piano-playing rabbit? (Everyone gathers around Yogi)
Interior. Abigail Adams High School. Mr. Matthews' History Classroom. Some students enter this class room, and sit on their desks.
Riley: Maya, I don't get it. Jexica has lost, like, half of her followers. How could this happen? What did I do? What kind of world is this?
Maya: You didn't do anything wrong, Riles. It's just a matter of time before people get over something that doesn't actually exist.
Riley: Poor Jexica.
Maya: She's not a thing.
Riley: All she ever wanted was love.
Maya: She doesn't exist.
Riley: I bet she wishes she'd never put up her own profile.
Maya: She's you.
Riley: Well, then how do I feel about this?
Maya: Leave me alone.
Cory: (to his students) Okay, historians will decide whatever they decide about us. How do you guys feel about who you are?
Zay: I got a hundred nine followers. I feel pretty good, no matter what happens.
Cory: Really? (to his students) What's valuable?
Farkle: Polar Bears are in North Pole. Penguins, South Pole, and the capital of Minnesota is St. Paul.
Cory: That's right. That's great. (To other students) Right? Isn't that great? "Charlie Bit My Finger".
Class: Charlie bit my finger. Charlie bit my finger. Oh, Charlie.
Cory: If something that's important to us today is so easily replaced by something else tomorrow, we have to wonder if it ever really had any value at all. What can we learn from that?
Riley: I-I don't know.
Cory: How do you not know?
Riley: I don't know because I live in a world that judges me based on whatever movie or song I like, and I'm expected to answer questions about myself, but I'm still figuring out who I am, and everything could change tomorrow.
Cory: Because who you are isn't measured by today, or tomorrow, (to his Students) but by a whole bunch of days of what you do. Not necessarily what you like, or what you say at a particular time. The great thing about evolving is that we continue to grow, and feel. Don't be influenced by somebody else's likes or clicks or favorites. Who should determine what you think?
Maya: Wikipedia. (Gets looked at)
Cory: You disgust me. Go figure this out on the bay window. (To his students) Class is ova! (the students rush out of the classroom)
Interior. The Matthews' Apartment. Riley's Bedroom.
Maya: Hey, huckleberry.
Lucas: Yes?
Maya: Whaddya know?
Lucas: I know a lot of things. I know that we need to stick together. I know that the only way that we can do that is if we're honest with each other.
Maya: Get to it?
Lucas: (To Riley) I know that you are Jexica.
Farkle: (To Riley) I know that you are Jexica.
Zay: (To Riley) Lucas told me that you were Jexica.
Riley: (To Maya, Farkle, Lucas and Zay) How'd you guys know that?
Lucas: We know who you are, Riley. You don't have to write down some fake profile for us to know who you are. I'd recognize you anywhere.
Maya: What? No, you said something to her so now you have to look at me and say something to me.
Lucas: I'd recognize you anywhere, too.
Maya: You're not even trying.
Lucas: I'm tired all the time.
Farkle: (To Riley, Maya, Lucas and Zay) Guys.
Zay: Yes?
Farkle: (To Riley, Maya, Lucas and Zay) I want us to last forever.
Riley: Well, how do we do that?
Maya: By finding out that friends who know who you are is the most real thing there is.
Lucas: (To Riley) So, Riley, what are you gonna put on your profile?
Maya: (To Riley) Yeah. Who are you?
Auggie's Sleep dream.
Cory: (Entering) Topanga. (Topanga stands up) I've been thinking about you all day and I wanna tell you something.
Topanga: I've been thinking about you all day and I wanna tell you something. Let's say it on a count of three.
Cory: Absolutely.
Cory and Topanga: (In unison) One, two, three!
Topanga: I don't want you to have a list of anything I do that you don't like. I tricked you, I won, and I feel good about it. But I don't ever want to do it again, and I'd like to forget about the 100 times that I did. Is that okay?
Auggie: (To Cory) Tell her it's okay, Dad.
Cory: (To Topanga) No, it's not okay.
Topanga: I'm giving you a chance to start over.
Cory: I wouldn't change one moment of anything we ever did.
Auggie: (To Topanga) That's pretty good, huh?
Topanga: Yeah, that's real good. (she sits on the couch with Cory)
Ava: (Entering) Auggie, where were you?
Auggie: What?
Ava: (Puts her briefcase of $30 million dollars U.S. on the floor) I e-mailed you. I told you to come to London. You left me hangin', baby.
Auggie: That was real? Why were you in London?
Ava: I had to stop there on my way back from Nairobi.
Auggie: You saw Prince Baji?
Ava: You mean the Baj? He gave me this. (opens the briefcase)
Auggie: $30 million dollars U.S.?
Ava: How do you like me now, Toby?
Topanga: Call me "Mommy."
Cory, Topanga, Auggie and Ava: Yay! Yay!
Auggie wakes up from his sleep dream.
Auggie: (Laughs) That was a good one. (Lies down on his side)
Interior. The Matthews' Apartment. Riley's Bedroom.
Maya: (Entering through the bay window) Step away from the internet.
Riley: I finally made my own profile. I put down all of my favorites. I put down everything that makes me who I am.
Maya: (Looking at Riley's profile) Hey, I know you.
Riley: Good. Let's watch this now.
Woman in the video: And who's your best friend? Who's your best friend? Who's your best friend? Who's your best friend? Who's your best friend? Who's your best friend? Pizza?
Riley and Maya: (Laughs)

Transcribed by Wc12271991

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